I’m terrified of the telephone. I don’t know what it is. I just hate picking it up, dialing those seven to ten digits, and then having to actually talk to someone. Part of it is my introversion – I’m not very good with people I don’t know. Part of it is insecurity – I’m always afraid I’ll make a fool of myself when I open my mouth. Part of it is that I’d just rather talk to someone face to face – I feel that I can express myself better in person, and I can also read their reactions better. Part of it is that I’m scared someone will pick up when I’m expecting to speak to a machine – I feel like I always end up stumbling all over myself in those cases.
I’m so glad to be living in the era of e-mail. It gives me an alternative form of contact where I can at least form my thoughts coherently without having to think on the fly or memorize some script. But there’s many times where I have to make that phone call.
It’s weird that I don’t have stage fright. I’m perfectly comfortable getting up in front of huge groups of people and speaking or performing. I don’t understand why that little electronic device can scare me so much.
This makes things difficult in building my caseload. I have to overcome this irrational fear to contact someone for the first time. I have to think about what I’m going to say. Then, I dial the number. Then, and this is the hard part, I hit “send.” And then I pray that I get a machine.
Sometimes, I wish I had taken a business class in college. Just some introductory thing where we could talk about strategies for contacting people, things I could say, tips for building up a business. It would have been nice. I’ve thought that it maybe should have been a part of the required curriculum, but what would I drop? Biology, probably – that was completely useless for what I’m doing. World history, perhaps. I placed out of math, so I didn’t have to do that, which was nice. But those core courses would be difficult to jettison. And I really don’t know what else I could’ve done.
Ah well. Just a few ramblings for today. Thanks for reading!